A blog about my interests, which include crazy quilting and various and assorted other artsy pursuits and sometimes known to contain mumblings of a random nature.

Wednesday, December 09, 2015

A little bit of Christmas CQ-ing

For your viewing pleasure (?!) I am going to break up posting pictures of my Christmas-themed pillow cover into several posts.  The simple reason for doing that is I gots me nuttin' else to show you!!  At least for the present moment.  There's been a lot of social things going on at Chez Magpie and therefore not much time for creativity.  And to top that off, I stumbled across a rather small goldmine of information down the rabbit hole rather more commonly known as Ancestry and I've been exploring and updating my family records.

So...here's part one of my Christmas pillow cover...







I belong to a number of mailing lists form various places and quite often someone posts a good 'funny'.  This one I felt I just had to share.....
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Dear Tech Support,
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slowdown in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and installed undesirable programs such as NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1.
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I do?
Yours,

Desperate


tech support 

Dear Desperate,
First, keep in mind that Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Please enter the command: "I thought you loved me.html", download Tears 6.2 and be sure to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If those applications work as they were designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

However, please remember that overuse of the above applications may cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6.1 is a risky application that may download the Snoring Loudly Beta program.

Whatever you do, DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)

In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall Boyfriend 5.0 while on Husband 1.0. This program is unsupported and will crash the system.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but does have limited memory and doesn't learn new applications quickly. You may consider running additional software to improve both memory and performance of the system. We recommend Cooking 3.0 and Hot_Lingerie 7.7.

Yours,
Tech Support

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Today your quote is from Kevin Costner.... "Life's better when it's fun.  Boy, that's deep, isn't it?"

EDITED TO ADD:  PLEASE READ THE COMMENT ON THIS POST FROM SARAH!  IT'S HILARIOUS!!!!



10 comments:

liniecat said...

LOLOLOL LOVE that post about the boyfriend and husband!!!
Its so true though : )

Christine Barnsley said...

Oh Mary Anne that has made me laugh... hilarious! Love your Christmas cushion!! Christine x

Createology said...

Oh how lovely your Christmas CQ is! I think seeing it in segments is even better...I am the one who likes to open a gift very very slowly in order to savor it.

Sarah Aldrich said...

I must say that my husband version, husband 28.0 as of last weekend seems to be a superior model. While cooking 3.0 is a total flop, the only part that seems to work is eggs in the drop down menu. Both laundry 5.1 and cleaning 6.3 work great. Personally I will always take gleaning and laundry apps over a cooking program. He has even uninstalled all sports apps, doesn't even keep them running in the background. Clearly he is happy with wife 2.0 as this version has lasted much longer than wife 1.0. We have both installed a new program this year grandchild 1.1. This program somehow seems to be taking over everything.

Emmy said...

love the christmas quilting and embroidery

Baa. xxx said...

Ha... ha.... too funny! Love the pic of your Christmas pillow.

Carol- Beads and Birds said...

That was a GREAT read...thanks for giving me a chuckle!!
Merry Christmas

Caroline Heinrichs said...

Oh so rich, I haven't laughed that hard for a long time!! Thanks for that, packing up for our venture south and needed a little laughter, thanks Mary Anne and by the way, that is an awesome Christmas crazy!!

Threads of Inspiration said...

You made my day with the husband 1.0 story! I got a good chuckle! Your Christmas pillow is beautiful! It's good to take a break from creativity for socializing. Enjoy it!!!!

Kim said...

Too, too funny. What an extraordinary amount of beautiful stitching is going into your Christmas pillow. I am enjoying these little peeks.